I picked up Nicole’s two boys today, they’re going to stay with me for a couple of weeks while my vet neuters them (Nicole lives in a different city).
I had them in the front seat & was singing to them on the drive home. At a red light, I became engrossed in serenading Phil with a Third Eye Blind song, but then I got to the line “I wanna stay right here & go down on you for an hour” & things got uncomfortable & I stopped mid-lyric & kind of awkwardly stared at him for a minute. He returned my awkward stare with a stare of his own, presumably because I had stopped talking to him (not because he understood that the line was about oral sex), but I was struck by how intelligent his look was—he was obviously responding to my eye contact & trying to understand my expression. Rats are very intelligent.
Then I look over & Steve is flat on his belly, legs splayed, burrowing through the bedding with a joyful expression like “LOOK AT ME, I’M A WORM, I’M A WORM!”
I then remembered a truth that anyone who has ever owned multiple rats will tell you: only *some* rats are intelligent.
(but thank you for the laugh, dear, simple Steve.)
I think I’ve been spending too much time alone lately.
I guess this makes me an overly needy person, but I wish i had someone I could call to just sit on the couch. We don’t have to talk & I wouldn’t cry, I just want someone to sit there & I could stroke their arm in a non-sexual manner. They could even play a video game & ignore me. I just feel really disconnected & like I’m floating away & it would be nice if I could just touch someone to feel like I was grounded.
I am so sick of my mood alternating between “OMG I AM THE COOLEST PERSON IN THE WORLD, EVERYTHING IS GREAT & LIFE IS FANTASTIC PEOPLE LOVE ME & I’M THE BEST” & “wow, I really, really, really want to hurt myself right now.” I’d almost rather stay sad all of the time because at least then I would know what to expect every morning.
Valdosta only pokes her head out of the hammock to see if I am going to feed her.
Being done with school is really, really nice when I’m in a good mood, but I’ve found that I spend a disturbing amount of time lying on the couch feeling like I should be crying, but somehow being too unmotivated to even do that.
In this photo, Vera has stolen Wesley’s vacant, sleepy expression. Normally, she is alert & intelligent-looking.
Nicole’s boys are coming to stay with me for a few weeks because she lives far away & my vet is going to neuter them.
I have a terrible time remembering other people’s rats’ names. Like, in theory, I can remember them, but when I’m talking to the rat, the name just doesn’t want to come out.
Thus, this one will be known as Fatjameson during his time with me, because he looks like Jameson if Jameson was three times as large. The other, Phil, will be known as Perfect Angel Snugglybuns Cupcake Darling Prince because I adore him & may steal him.
